The Propheteer

Geeky Cuberat: “Man, when Dan* was down it seemed like every time he went to use the bathroom it was being cleaned”
Non-Geeky Cuberat: “I know…he totally kirked out about it”
Geeky Cuberat: “Yeah, he….wait, WHAT?”
Non-Geeky Cuberat: “He kirked out about it.”
Me: “Um…how do you mean that?”
Non-Geeky Cuberat: “Well…how would YOU mean it?”
Geeky Cuberat: “Like…Kirk? James T.?”
Non-Geeky Cuberat: “Huh?”
Me: “Y’know…William Shatner…like….KHAAAAANNNN!!!!!!”
Non-Geeky Cuberat: “Oh…yeah, pretty much like that. What else would it be?”
Geeky Cuberat: “Well…we just didn’t expect that out of YOU. I mean…maybe you were thinking of another Kirk. Like maybe Kirk Cobain”
Me: “Hang on…First off, that’s KURT Cobain. And second, what would that even entail? He was so pissed off about the bathroom being closed that he committed suicide?”
Geeky Cuberat: “Dude, it’s not like that’s all he did. He wasn’t born, sat in his house for 20 years and then offed himself.”
Me: “So, what, you’re saying Dan got up, went the the bathroom, and when it was closed he wrote a depressing grunge ditty?”

I believe it was at that point that all three of use were laughing so hard that we couldn’t catch enough breath to continue the discussion.

* Names have been changed to protect the guilty

Tags: hitch by hitch
No Comments »

So, part of why I’ve been poking around at my blog recently is the fact that this is an invaluable tool to reach…well, 5 people. But maybe I’ll reach a lot more. See, here’s the deal: I’ve signed up this year for the Tour De Cure, a bike ride fundraiser event to raise money and awareness for diabetes. My personal page for fundraising is up there too, so feel free to contribute - I’d be *very* grateful. If you go to the site and read what I said, you’ll see how personally I’m taking this ride. Diabetes as a condition appears to be circling my family and friends, and I can feel its target set right on me. It would be too much to say that I’m scared, but I’m certainly concerned, and that concern starts with the people around me and, the one that motivates me most, ends with me. So this year we’re going to do the 32 mile ride, and we’ve pledged the minimum amount, just to see if we can. Next year, I’m going to do the 64 mile ride, and I intend to do more than double the pledge. Help me find out how much I can pledge next year by helping me raise the money this year. Hopefully I’ll get to stop asking for money at some point, when there’s no more reason to ride these things.

Tags: hitch by hitch
No Comments »

experiencing some minor technical difficulties. Please be patient.

Tags: hitch by hitch
No Comments »

So the problem with swimming is you get bored before you get tired.
okay, I get bored before I get tired. I think that probably says more about my attention span than it does about my stamina as a swimmer - though my swimming isn’t bad. Used to be one of my stronger points.
I think part of the problem is that swimming is almost never used as an actual method of transportation except in extreme circumstances and emergencies.
No one ever says “I think I’ll swim down to the corner store. You guys want anything?”
I mean, I can walk, run, or bike all sorts of places and it’s not only normal, it’s encouraged. Even when swimming is the shortest route, it’s at the bottom of the list of locomotion alternatives. I mean, seriously - if you’re walking through the woods and you come across a lake, spying on the opposite bank a particularly interesting variety of flora, would you a) swim across the lake or b) follow the shore around until you get there. You chose b, right?
(actually, you probably chose c) what do I care about the local plantlife?)
I blame the urban planning committees of major metropolitan areas that have completely failed to design their infrastructure around swimmers. I say we start lobbying now for swimming paths alongside the sidewalks of our nation’s great cities. Join with me now in calling for an end to the tyranny of the feet. Lap lanes for the masses!

Tags: hitch by hitch
1 Comment »

There once was a man from Nantucket
Who lived in a very nice house in the suburbs
With his beautiful wife and three children

Tags: hitch by hitch
1 Comment »